Encouragement

When given trust and freedom in her learning, the child stays fully connected to that strong inner drive to wonder about life, to explore and drink up life, and to advance her learning.

“Encouragement” is a very interesting word.  It looks different for different families.  For some, encouragement may look like being attuned, present and available to the child.  For others, it can involve different degrees of manipulation - from subtle to not so subtle - where the parent is putting "where he wants the child to be" ahead of where the child is optimally "at" in her development. In this sense, "encouragement" involves "prodding" rather than a sense of trust that the child's learning choices are a reflection of Optimal Rightness. 

If we look at the message our “encouragement” could be sending to our child, we should be able to notice if we are following an observe-and-support approach, or if we are allowing some old control-based beliefs to creep in.  If we find we fall in the latter category, we need to examine our fears about learning.  What are we concerned “may not happen” through natural unfolding of learning and why?  Is the prodding worth the energy we give it, and is it worth the discomfort, distrust and disempowerment it creates for our child?

We want to become aware of any tendencies to artificially steer our children in any particular direction. Artificial refers to acting from a place of fear or lack when it comes to learning and Being. "Encouraging" involves trusting, noticing, observing and then "being with" the learner in a way that is mutually evolutionary.  if we are tuned-in through observation, we are better able to “know” ourselves and child through and through, hence, provide for each learning endeavour in ways a caring supporter senses are the most beneficial.